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  • Writer's pictureAll Things Melanin

#Friendship Goals

As you grow through life, you'll find that a true, genuine, down to earth friend is  one of the most valuable people you can have around. Friends are like the family members we get to choose because they're there for us when we need them most. If it's one thing that we've realized lately, it's that everyone has a different definition of what a friends is and that everyone will not be the type of friend to you that you are to them.  At a certain point in life, it becomes less important how many friends you have and more important the type of friends that you have. We'd rather have one or two real ass friends than a dozen phonies.

Let's be honest, everyone's always down and a good friend until stuff gets real and life happens. Go through some real tough stuff, some stuff that will make you cry or those days where all you can do is shake your head from frustration and anger. Sometimes life can be so unpredictable and cruel.

You'll find in those moments who your real friends are, and sometimes you can distinguish in the simplest situation.

So many times, we assume that if we've known a person for a certain amount of years that we have to keep them around because they have our back, that that's a good friend.  How that person had our back in 10th grade doesn't attest to their loyalty and neither does the length of time you've known someone. Years and time don't necessarily equate to loyalty or genuine friendships. 

A genuine friend is someone who ....

1. Supports and Encourages you.

2. Holds you Accountable.

3. Has your back through the good and the bad.

4. Pushes you to be the best you can be.

5. Tells you when you're wrong.

6. Loves you.

7. Has your best interest at heart.

8. Is ready for any and everything you throw at them.

9. Is honest and communicates with you, whether the conversation is easy or hard.

10. Puts in the effort and makes a conscious effort to be a good friend.

And the list goes on and on. Don't feel bad for disassociating yourself from someone, you have the right to do so. If someone's not making you better or helping you, you don't need them. You are who you hang out with and if you're associating yourself with someone who isn't what you're about, you're only hurting yourself.

Have enough love and respect for yourself that you leave any type of toxic or unhealthy friendship right now.  

W're so used to equating success and happiness to how many people we have around us  because they say it takes a village or team to get there right? But it's not the size of your village or team, but the quality.

So in this season, stop carrying around others. Trust your gut. Your village or team may not be huge, but when you have the right people on your side, no matter the number, you'll find more comfort in  your journey and more peace with yourself. 

So here's to good friends!


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